oh hey hows it going? | IM BACK, whats been happening?! \m/

HEY GUYS

have ya missed me... you probably havent, because i havent wrote a blog in like FOR EV ER.

sooooo, as you know i havent been writing at all really, im trying to speed up my recovery lmao!

I'm doing okay, im still quite sore here and there, i also get some pains in my chest at times but im so far recovering physically really quickly, the only thing is my emotional side is going to take longer obviously, because going through what i did and coming out of it not working again gets to me alot, and also being told that in 2 years time (fingers crossed if nothing goes wrong) ill be fixed with a pace maker. Slowly but surely the emotional side has hit me, and its going to, but i think this year has been really tough not just for me but for my family.

The thing i love about having such a strong family around me is that we dont go through things individually, we go through it together, and if you try to deal with things on your own, theres always someone thatll bring out the problems and help you through them.

So anyway not alot has been happening, i have started reading the Harry Potter book set, and im absolutely in love with them!! cant believe half the stuff they put in the book wasnt in the film, but you cant fit a whole book in a film which is what ive learnt after reading alot of books! But yeah im on order of the phoenix at the moment, i started reading them at the beginning of the month. Ive only really been wanting to read to help my mind go on something else, and then the family and i organised to go to WARNER BROTHER STUDIOS again!!!! absolutely in love with the place, it makes me feel like a child and its so fun to look around the whole place! my mum is definitely excited to go. Its a couple of days before my results (which im already worried about) so itll let me have some calm time before i get them, hopefully i get in next year lmao.

Apart from that, not alot has been happening, weve all had a bit of an emotional month, and its only going to get worse before it gets better, and i dont think alot of people realise that saying. Alot of the time i see people hoping that when something goes bad it automatically just gets better straight after it, when in reality nothing gets better straight away, it takes strength and courage to make things get better, and it does take time. When i was younger i used to be such an asshole, i used to mouth off at people on facebook, and i tend not to do that anymore, because well when your younger (and especially with the school i went to) it was all about hierarchy, and who had a bigger mouth, but really i wasnt that big, i wasnt all mouth i did actually have some times when i thought what the hell am i doing with myself, by mouthing off at people at school and on facebook it made me out to look like a fucking idiot to be honest, and by the end of it alot of my 'friends' completely forgot me when i left, the same with being in college, you have the first couple of friends you make, and then after being off for a while you start to realise who actually cares, and who actually matters.

Ill always be nice to the people who are nice to me, but when it comes to the point where i dont think they want to be bothered with i wont bother with them back, and thats what i learnt growing up, i had to grow up quickly with what was happening in my life, but in the long term i think its made me a better person in a way, i have alot more respect for certain aspects and things in my life, and i dont take a lot for granted, but at the same time i stand up for myself and dont take shit from people. My family have been a great help with that, theyve tried to keep my anger at bay because its good to have to flip out at some people who dont give a shit, or think they can act bigger, but theyve also taught me how to respect and care for others in alot more friendlier fashion than i used to.

This is the thing, you can have many friends throughout life, for your WHOLE life, but family will always stay forever, whether you fuck up or you dont. Yeah okay some family members can be a pain in the arse, and some of them you want nothing to do with, but in the end of it all you wont have anything stronger than the bond and love of your family.

Dont take people for granted, dont let yourself be treated like an object, and always keep your head held high, because theres no point in letting other people get you down, itll show that your weak and that they have won...

Sorry for the deep blog, but ill be doing daily ones now!! yaaaaaaaay \m/


STAY RAD
mk xx